• Guest would you be interested in CUPRA or SEAT valve caps? let us know in the poll

  • Welcome to our new sponsor Lecatona, a brand dedicated to enhancing performance for VAG group sports cars, including SEAT, Audi, Volkswagen and Škoda. Specializing in High Pressure Fuel Pump (HPFP) upgrades.

Forge Remap Software?!?

ForgeMotorsport

Full Member
Andy

Have you got the inside line on Forge or what ....cos thats uncanny .
We have recently taken on a new member of staff from Sweden Odlid Tubb

His job is to make the ladies fancy things improve in performance , The Forge furry rabbit ( patent pending) is in the final stages of test, this wonderfull piece of sexual orgasmatron allows the user to fullfil any hole orgasm .
and we mean any hole , today we had a large mess after Odlid accidently scratched his nostril with the furry rabbit .

So we up load a programme of your choice through the mains charge point .
Its switchable and undectable to Ann Summers main dealer software .

The settings are
1 Gentle carress ( recommended for the inexperienced)
2 Frantic Frig ( says it all really , use when the ladies just need to get off real quick maybe in a fag break )

3 Full on shudder ( rather like a kit kat ) look it up if you dont no the meaning
4 Niagra falls vag gusher ( this setting should only be used with plastic sheets and lots of towels)


This Furry Rabbit should be available for order in the next few days .
We are also working on a 3 phase mains version for industrial usage , maybe in a busy brothell with 4 or 5 positions so we can have muti users

Check out the web site

www.anyholevaggusherclitoralstimulation.shag
 

UncleFester

Grumpier by the day!
Apr 30, 2006
4,764
1
Milton Keynes
www.facebook.com
Just read this - if i was in the market for an FMIC / remap i'd come down there just for the crack :D

Can you do anything with my Dysons? I am sure mine could do with one of those electric supercharger things to increase vortex speeds :) I've also got an aging qualcast rotary mower that would sound cool and go better with a whooshy dump valve, FMIC and a monster turbo fitted [B)]
 

gavthelad

Bring on the Boooooost
Nov 19, 2005
1,394
0
Redditch (Midlands)
Just read this - if i was in the market for an FMIC / remap i'd come down there just for the crack :D

Can you do anything with my Dysons? I am sure mine could do with one of those electric supercharger things to increase vortex speeds :) I've also got an aging qualcast rotary mower that would sound cool and go better with a whooshy dump valve, FMIC and a monster turbo fitted [B)]

the problem with a dyson is that its stock performance provider is completely unreliable......ive heard some horror stories where owners have spent copious amounts of cash in an attemp to modify the standard motor resulting in the un-necessary ripping and shredding of the carpet pile itself.

Obviously, if you were to install a platinum triple twanger roter to its undercarriage then the electric supercharger will be very compatable with this modification....

I have even read reports in the performance section of max vaccer magazine that owners have even installed wet nitrous systems with progressive boost controllers capable of sucking down cobwebs from the ceiling without having to lift the vac from the floor or even move the accessory hose.:D
 

Ruddmeister

Everything in Moderation
Jun 23, 2003
8,218
1
Weston-super-Mare
en.wikipedia.org
Just read this - if i was in the market for an FMIC / remap i'd come down there just for the crack :D

Can you do anything with my Dysons? I am sure mine could do with one of those electric supercharger things to increase vortex speeds :) I've also got an aging qualcast rotary mower that would sound cool and go better with a whooshy dump valve, FMIC and a monster turbo fitted [B)]

The main problem with early Dyson cleaners was the Cold Air Dual Cyclone Intake technology, the solution is a modified air intake.

You need to increase the Mass Air Flow going through Dyson to improve performance.

Contrary to popular belief you do not need a bespoke remap to compliment the intake, the Dyson brain is adaptive and sences the extra air.

I'm not sure if Forge do a modified intake and filter?
 

ForgeMotorsport

Full Member
We have a specialists section on the mighty vacuum cleaner in our USA Forge Orlando office , unfortunately last year during a test session they had a machine that craked under the extreme vortex , it escaped and wrecked havock over New Orleans , we now have a detuned tornado version being worked on .
 

UncleFester

Grumpier by the day!
Apr 30, 2006
4,764
1
Milton Keynes
www.facebook.com
http://www.spencerturbine.com/News/bigvacuum.html

Is this one of yours?

image001.jpg
 

gavthelad

Bring on the Boooooost
Nov 19, 2005
1,394
0
Redditch (Midlands)
We have a specialists section on the mighty vacuum cleaner in our USA Forge Orlando office , unfortunately last year during a test session they had a machine that craked under the extreme vortex , it escaped and wrecked havock over New Orleans , we now have a detuned tornado version being worked on .

I was under the impression that a re-enforced housing was under constuction at area 52? this im led to believe has been tried and tested and is capable of sucking a bounty hunter complete with his land rover defender from a sand dune at a range of 1000ft......
 

ForgeMotorsport

Full Member
News update
Odlid Tubb our expert from our sister company www.anyholevaggusherclitoralstimulation.shag

Has been working with the vacuum secion in the USA .
It has long been a belief that the ladies get all the pleasure from the sex toys that are around , the guys they have nothing , ( well personally I am not inserting anything up my arse )

So Odlid has been working on a mens pleasure system , it will incorporate the reworked lower power suction vacuum device that fits on to soft electrically virbrating bag filled with a custard like soloution ( to simulate the female mouth ) with a small orrifice .

Early test are very very statisfactory , we will have a two speed version with more attachments available later mainly to be aimed at the S & M crowd , you know maybe some nails in sharp tacks in the custard .

Any way all details as usual here www.suckmycockoffyoubitch.ahole
 

AwesomeSarah

Forum Sponsor
Mar 6, 2006
727
0
Hi Pete
Now I hope that you will keep us all informed with the developments on ALL the upgrades that you do ;)
Sarah
 
Lecatona HPFP (High-pressure Fuel Pump Upgrades)